HANDLE WITH CARE
A broken guitar string, the Traveling Wilburys, and giving ourselves a break. Plus: I'm performing tomorrow in NYC, and last call to work with me 1:1 in Fortress!
Hi dear readers..Thank you for supporting Resilience — however it works for you. A few things to share, more info on the below after the essay…Sending love to all. Enjoy this week’s tiny tale…xx
If you’re in New York City tomorrow Thursday 3/27 from 6-9pm, I’ll be playing a few songs to celebrate the opening of the new Apiece Apart store in SoHo (183 Lafayette Street). Come say hi!
I’m booking writers to work with me 1:1 in Fortress starting in April! You can schedule a free 30-min consultation to learn more (and read what other writers are saying about this work, too). Last call, limited spots.
Yesterday, while practicing for tomorrow’s performance (my first in a lot of years), I broke a guitar string. It was 5:00pm, the guitar store across the river was about to close…plus dinner had to be made, the dog had to be walked…
I got TOTALLY bent out of shape.
How could I not have extra strings?
Why am I always so unprepared?
Why is everything so HARD!
“I’ll be right back!” I screamed to my pre-teens, to the dog. I hopped into my car, driving like a madwoman over the bridge, arriving at the guitar store just minutes before closing.
The guy behind the counter (always a guy) asked me what kind of strings I wanted. I drew a blank.
“The 10s?” he asked.
“Yeah, the 10s!” I said, hoping I was right.
The voice inside my head started up again.
You don’t even know what kind of strings you need?
What a has-been!
This is going to be a DISASTER!
As I put myself through self-absorbed hell — my speciality! — that old Traveling Wilburys song, ‘Handle With Care’ came on. I didn’t realize my shoulders were up to my fucking ears until I heard George Harrison’s voice:
Been beat up and battered 'round
Been sent up, and I've been shot down
Yeah, that’s about right.
I remembered the music video to this totally not-cool song like it was yesterday. George Harrison, Tom Petty, Roy Orbison, wait, who was the fourth dude, ah, Jeff Lynne, all facing each other, taking turns, sharing the mic…
Reputations changeable
Situations tolerable
Baby, you're adorable
Handle me with care
And then Roy Orbison swoons in all:
I'm so tired of being lonely
I still have some love to give
Won't you show me that you really care?
That part always made my little sister and I crack up. Roy’s turn! He’s still got some love to give!
I was a VH1 kid. I’m not going to pretend I was an MTV kid; my short-lived cool cred came later. But how I loved those ’80s videos, like mini-movies, and the story-driven tales they spun…
As I had my middle-aged lite rock moment, right there in the guitar store, it hit me like a, yes, snapped guitar string to the face:
Why can’t I handle MYSELF with care?
I’M so tired of being lonely!
I love music! I still have some love to give!
The guy came back with the 10s. I noticed a super cool 12 string electric Danelectro hanging on the wall.
“That Danelectro looks amazing,” I said.
“Yeah, she’s a beauty…”
“Early 90s right?”
We chatted about 12 strings, pedals, just all of it. My shoulders started to relax, I forgot all about not knowing if I needed 10s or 20s or whatever…I forgot about the *delightful* feelings I’d been carrying around for weeks, trying to keep my own little dramas at bay while the world seems to get more and more complicated…
“You okay?” the guy asked, handing me my strings.
“Yes, I think so,” I said.
“Hey,” he said, as the Traveling Wilburys finished their song. “Don’t forget to have some fun with those strings, okay?”
I took my first deep breath in days.
“I will,” I said.
I drove slowly, through the fog and clouds, over the bridge to home.
A MEDITATION
May I handle myself (and all beings) with care.
Feel free to leave a little story in the comments. Maybe a time a beloved song brought you back, or the kindness of a stranger that made everything better…
We still have a lot of love to give.
xx Alexa
PS. You can explore my whole music catalog here. I’m happy to share that a new album is coming soon…
PS. I’m excited to help celebrate my dear friends Starr and Laura, co-founders of Apiece Apart and their new store opening! If you’re around, swing by. Apiece Apart celebrates women and their stories, and I’ll be a singing a few of my stories in their beautiful space…
PPS.…Last call to work with me 1:1 in FORTRESS! Click here to book a call, learn more, and read what other writers are saying. Email alexa@alexawilding.com if you need another time. Limited spots, and last call for this particular offering :) xx If you’ve been curious, let’s chat! xx
Have the BEST time performing again!
My boyfriend and I, who live 90 miles apart, were on the phone yesterday, trying to make weekend plans, taking into account deadlines, trying to accommodate others, trying to be sensitive to what each other needed. The conversation went round and round until we settled.
It has been a week of changed and cancelled plans for me and when I hung up, I suddenly had tears flowing.
And the. i read your post and just laughed as I listened to the song. Perfect timing! I, too, remembered the force of Roy Orbison chiming in. I started reframing his the weekend plans actually worked better for me and all was well. What a group of musicians and a perfect so g dor moments like this!